You walk into a busy public bathroom with a full bladder, all the cubicles are full, and the urinal is one with no privacy dividers. Just one long trough with a bunch of guys pissing.
You step up to the urinal and try to get the flow going. The seconds past…and nothing happens.
Your body locks up, your heart starts to pound, your mind races and no matter how bad you need to go, the tap is shut.
If this sounds familiar, you are not alone.
This condition is called shy bladder syndrome. It affects millions of guys around the world and has different forms.
- Can’t use a public bathroom at all.
- Can only pee in the cubicle.
- Can’t pee in the cubicle if someone else is nearby.
- Can’t pee at the urinal full stop.
- You are alone but as soon as the bathroom door opens the pee won’t happen.
- Can’t pee at the urinal if someone else is in the bathroom, even if they’re in a cubicle.
- Can’t pee at the urinal is someone else is standing at the urinal.
This photo is nightmare fuel for someone with a shy bladder:
This condition is super frustrating, embarrassing, and exhausting. Every time you fail to piss the anxiety loop is compounded and the next time is even harder.
The good news?
It’s completely beatable given time and practice. This habit is best broken when you are a teenager otherwise you will be dealing with it as an adult.
To break the habit, visit urinals where you don’t know anyone. Such as the local mall or library. Pick a bathroom that is not super busy but has some foot traffic.
Step 1
When you use the cubicle to pee, imagine you are using the nearby urinal. Picture it as you pee. Use the cubicle when other people are in the bathroom. Practice peeing when there is a noisy environment.
Step 2
Use the urinal when there is no one else in the bathroom. Take deep breaths, stay calm, close your eyes if you need to, and start the flow. Relax into the feeling and remember it.
Step 3
Use the urinal when there is someone using the cubicle but not the urinal. There is no chance they will interrupt you, as you can hear them flush before they come out. This gets you used to having someone else in the same bathroom while you pee at the urinal. Repeat until you are comfortable.
Step 4
Use the urinal when someone is using the hand basin washing their hands. Relax, take some deep breaths and focus on a spot on the wall until you feel it coming. Don’t leave until you start peeing. Even if they have left the bathroom before you can start. It’s a win.
This makes you more comfortable to have people around you when you start peeing. Repeat until you are comfortable.
Step 5
Find a urinal that has privacy dividers. These are much easier to handle.
Attempt to pee with another guy standing at the urinal. This is the tough one and helps to have a very full bladder. Stand there for as long as it takes. Even if he finishes and you haven’t started.
The fact you attempted is a win.
Step 6
Attempt to take a pee at the ‘trough’. The long metal urinal with no dividers. Very common in pubs across Australia. Use a corner and stand there for as long as it takes. Same as the above.
The attempt is a win. Take it as such.
Step 7
Try again and again. You don’t know these people. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Don’t over think it and just relax into the flow state.
End goal
Eventually you can hopefully stand up and take a piss with a guy standing next to you.
If this doesn’t work, there is always the cubicle. Unfortunately, in crowded bathrooms there is often a line for it.
This is especially common in Australia as most public urinals don’t have privacy dividers. Hopefully they’ll start to catch on. Who wants to watch another bloke piss?